Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
