Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
