Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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