too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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