Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
