just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
