plz talk dirty to me
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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