he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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