why didn't you poke me back
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Randomize
