Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
