I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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