while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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