i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
