Just cropdusted the office
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
