Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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