So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
