The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Randomize
