i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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