If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
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