If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize