just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize