I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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