why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize