I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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