The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Randomize
