Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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