Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Randomize