butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
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