Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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