his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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