glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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