She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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