I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I just want nice things and good sex
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
