btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
