Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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