True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
