My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
