Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
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Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
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In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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