If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I can't put those talents on a resume
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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