is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
