Welp...herpes.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
