when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
