I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
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