I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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