i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
He felt like a one man threesome
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
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