It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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