Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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