At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I believe in your delicious
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
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