y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize
