She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
